When I look back now I see how many things that happened to me, that I could’ve avoided, hurt me or caused hurt. Some of these things God warned me about, but I was blind. Things like lies. The times I hurt my parents the most was when they discovered my secrets. Things I had lied to them about. If I had just gone to them from the beginning they would have helped me and a lot of pain would’ve been spared. But I was scared: I was scared of judgement and punishment. Decisions based on fear are usually unhealthy decisions. We need to ask God for strength, guidance and courage. He will give it to us.
When I look back now I’m glad for the rules I had, for if they hadn’t been there I don’t want to know how much worse my story could’ve been. Sometimes I wish my parents would’ve been even stricter, I would’ve hated it then, but now I know it really is for my own protection and out of love.
Don’t believe the lies the world tells you about yourself. Seek God when it comes to who you are. Seek freedom, freedom from secrets and lies and fear. God wants you to be free just as He has set me free. Sometimes the healing process is even more difficult than the event where the pain was caused, but there’s a difference. This pain is leading to wholeness. The other pain just festers, it’s never-ending. The pain of healing is temporary, and if you just push through you will find freedom. Hang in there as God scrapes the dirt out of your wounds, it is so that they can finally heal.
Finally I can truly say that I have been set free by the Grace of God undeservingly.
He has broken the chains that held me down because of my past.
Isaiah 61:3
"To all who mourn in Israel, He will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair. In their righteousness, they will be like great oaks that the Lord has planted for His own Glory."
Isaiah 61:10
"I am overwhelmed with joy in the Lord my God! For He has dressed me with the clothing of salvation and draped me in a robe of righteousness."
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